Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
