if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Randomize