My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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