Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
