escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
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