watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
