Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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