Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
