omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Two words: blizzard sex
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
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