no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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