her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Randomize
