The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
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