return my video game
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Randomize
