that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
My cat gives me a boner
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
