And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
