i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
