It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
