Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
