there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Randomize