thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Randomize
