Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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