GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
