My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
