question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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