that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
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