Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Randomize
