he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I made him laugh his dick is mine
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize