Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Randomize
