On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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