he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
