Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Randomize
