He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
