I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
