are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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