Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
