Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
