My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
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