Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
