Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
