i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
