Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Randomize
