he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
