hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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