you win again, gameday.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize