Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
