just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
She's like a pop up book from hell.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Randomize
