Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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