he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize