i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
