I think scott just propositioned me for sex
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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