listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
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