My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
